{"id":1762894,"date":"2023-09-02T16:41:27","date_gmt":"2023-09-02T15:41:27","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pressenza.com\/?p=1762894"},"modified":"2023-09-02T16:41:27","modified_gmt":"2023-09-02T15:41:27","slug":"gracies-fracas-si-no-hagues-estat-per-tu","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pressenza.com\/ca\/2023\/09\/gracies-fracas-si-no-hagues-estat-per-tu\/","title":{"rendered":"Gr\u00e0cies frac\u00e0s, si no hagu\u00e9s estat per tu…"},"content":{"rendered":"

Creieu que fracasar en alguna cosa \u00e9s… un frac\u00e0s? Un error? Un desastre? Alguna cosa que cal evitar? Tot el contrari!<\/span><\/p>\n

D’acord, en realitat dep\u00e8n de quina sigui la nostra direcci\u00f3 de vida. Ja hem dit que aquesta \u00e9s una psicologia existencial, per la qual cosa el tema de la direcci\u00f3 \u00e9s fonamental. Si el meu cam\u00ed de vida es dirigeix cap als meus \u00e8xits externs (sobretot els meus), llavors s\u00ed, un frac\u00e0s \u00e9s un horror, ja que s’oposa al meu desig d’\u00e8xit. No obstant aix\u00f2, si la meva vida es dirigeix cap a la superaci\u00f3 del sofriment, cap a l’evoluci\u00f3, el creixement intern i l’alliberament dels encadenaments mentals, llavors el frac\u00e0s \u00e9s un aliat extraordinari, car ens allibera, precisament, d’un somieig il\u00b7lusori que ens manejava.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Per Jordi Jim\u00e9nez<\/p>\n

Somieigs<\/b><\/p>\n

En l’article anterior ja vam parlar de qu\u00e8 eren els somieigs: aquest conjunt d’imatges que apareixen de manera mec\u00e0nica quan estem en vig\u00edlia i que ennuvolen el nostre estat mental. Ara afegirem alguna cosa m\u00e9s: aquests somieigs, aquestes imatges, van apareixent per compensar situacions, s\u00f3n respostes compensat\u00f2ries a est\u00edmuls interns o externs. \u00c9s a dir, tinc sensaci\u00f3 de fam (est\u00edmul intern) i apareixen en el meu espai mental imatges (somieigs) de menjar, d’anar a la nevera o d’anar a un restaurant (compensaci\u00f3 de l’est\u00edmul de fam).<\/span><\/p>\n

Surto al carrer i noto que fa fred (est\u00edmul extern) i m’apareixen imatges de llocs calentons o d’unes vacances a la platja (compensaci\u00f3 de l’est\u00edmul). Aquests somieigs s\u00f3n anomenats secundaris perqu\u00e8 s\u00f3n situacionals, \u00e9s a dir, una vegada que la situaci\u00f3 canvia o l’est\u00edmul desapareix, el somieig tamb\u00e9 canvia o desapareix.<\/span><\/p>\n

Per\u00f2, hi ha somieigs que s\u00f3n constants, que romanen encara que les situacions canvi\u00efn. S\u00f3n els somieigs primaris. Per exemple, si sempre he tingut una sensaci\u00f3 d’inseguretat davant el futur i els imprevistos, per compensaci\u00f3, tendeixo a somiejar i a buscar situacions estables i predictibles que em deixin una sensaci\u00f3 de tranquil\u00b7litat.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

Si, per exemple, sempre m’he sentit sol i desemparat tendeixo a buscar situacions de protecci\u00f3 i companyia. O, si sempre m’he sentit infravalorat i poca cosa tendeixo a compensar-ho buscant protagonisme i sent perfeccionista per evitar la cr\u00edtica.<\/span><\/p>\n

En fi, hi ha centenars de combinacions possibles. Tots, absolutament tots, tenim somieigs primaris constants, que estan compensant alguna mancan\u00e7a i que no depenen d’ocasions concretes, sin\u00f3 que apareixen en totes les situacions encara les m\u00e9s diferents. El meu somieig d’estabilitat, el meu somieig de protecci\u00f3 o el meu somieig de protagonisme estan actuant en el meu model de fam\u00edlia, en el meu model de treball, en les meves amistats, en les meves relacions \u00edntimes… arreu. En tots els \u00e0mbits de la meva vida tendeixo a buscar all\u00f2 que compensa les meves mancances b\u00e0siques.<\/span><\/p>\n

Observi’s que el nucli d’aquests somieigs \u00e9s un clima emocional, \u00e9s una emoci\u00f3 difusa i generalitzada (d’aqu\u00ed ve que li diguem “clima”, veure article 20<\/a>), un sentiment de temor, de desemparament o del que sigui. I aquest clima emocional dif\u00fas \u00e9s el que genera unes certes imatges en forma de somieigs compensatoris.<\/span><\/p>\n

Amb els somieigs passa igual que amb altres temes que hem tractat aqu\u00ed: no cal lluitar contra ells, no cal eliminar-los, ni tan sols cal esfor\u00e7ar-se a canviar-los. A m\u00e9s, tal cosa no \u00e9s possible. Es tracta de comprendre com funcionen, com estan actuant en mi. Aix\u00f2 \u00e9s com descobrir el truc del mag: una vegada saps el truc ja no t\u00e9 gr\u00e0cia, ja no te’l creus, perd el seu encant, es perd la il\u00b7lusi\u00f3 i veus la realitat d’una manera nova. En el m\u00f3n intern passa igual. Cal descobrir el truc per sortir del m\u00f3n d’all\u00f2 que \u00e9s il\u00b7lusori i entrar en una realitat nova.<\/span><\/p>\n

Aix\u00ed doncs, vaig per la vida arrossegat del nas pels de somieigs compensatoris que van orientant la meva direcci\u00f3 i van decidint que faig i\u00a0 que no faig. Poso en marxa projectes i em plantejo objectius mogut per aquestes imatges que em reconforten, m’agraden i em motiven.<\/span><\/p>\n

Per\u00f2 llavors ocorre aix\u00f2: el frac\u00e0s. Les coses no surten com jo volia, o simplement no surten. Els meus projectes, els meus plans, han fracassat. Em desanimo, m’ensorro, em quedo sense cam\u00ed, sense rumb, em pregunto per qu\u00e8 ha ocorregut aix\u00f2…<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Aprofitem per a con\u00e8ixer-nos<\/b><\/p>\n

Tots hem viscut alguna situaci\u00f3 aix\u00ed en m\u00e9s d’una ocasi\u00f3. Qu\u00e8 estem dient ara? Que cal aprofitar aquesta sensaci\u00f3 de frac\u00e0s per observar quins somieigs l’han provocat; per aturar-se un moment, reflexionar i estudiar amb detall quin era l’impuls compensatori que movia aquest projecte.<\/span><\/p>\n

No estem tractant de jutjar res, no est\u00e0 b\u00e9 ni malament, nom\u00e9s volem observar i comprendre. I, si aconseguim desembolicar aquest nus, descobrirem una cosa molt interessant: en realitat no he fracassat. S’ha fet evident el meu somieig i que aquest somieig tenia moltes dosis d’il\u00b7lusi\u00f3, d’irrealitat. Per aix\u00f2 no ha sortit. I si he aconseguit veure com ha actuat, si veig com estic funcionant, quantes s\u00f3n les meves compensacions, haur\u00e9 guanyat en criteri de realitat, ja que pel proper projecte podr\u00e9 separar millor el que \u00e9s possible del que \u00e9s il\u00b7lusori.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n

No estem dient que cal ser pragm\u00e0tic i deixar-se d’utopies. No \u00e9s aix\u00f2. En moltes ocasions el projecte \u00e9s v\u00e0lid, per\u00f2, per exemple, volem obtenir resultats a curt termini i aix\u00f2 no \u00e9s possible; o b\u00e9, volem ser protagonistes d’aquest projecte i despr\u00e9s les coses succeeixen d’una altra forma; o b\u00e9, he volgut tenir-ho tot tan controlat que, al final, s’ha descontrolat tot; o b\u00e9, he for\u00e7at tant la gent que m’acompanyava que al final m’he quedat sol.<\/span><\/p>\n

\u00c9s a dir, en moltes ocasions el que fracassa no \u00e9s el projecte, sin\u00f3 els somieigs que se m’hi han colat. I tal vegada, \u00e9s per aquests somieigs que el projecte fracassa, per\u00f2 aix\u00f2 no vol dir que el projecte no sigui v\u00e0lid, ni vol dir que no sigui possible o desitjable. A m\u00e9s, per a una vida plena i unitiva \u00e9s necessari tenir projectes, tenir el futur obert, fer coses en el m\u00f3n.<\/span><\/p>\n

En realitat, no importa si els projectes fracassen, perqu\u00e8 sempre podem posar en marxa noves idees i d’aquests fracassos aparents haurem apr\u00e8s molt de les nostres il\u00b7lusions, i avan\u00e7arem aix\u00ed cap a una vida m\u00e9s desperta i l\u00facida.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Creieu que fracasar en alguna cosa \u00e9s… un frac\u00e0s? Un error? Un desastre? Alguna cosa que cal evitar? Tot el contrari! D’acord, en realitat dep\u00e8n de quina sigui la nostra direcci\u00f3 de vida. Ja hem dit que aquesta \u00e9s una…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1680,"featured_media":1762897,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[35531,35513,35526],"tags":[115763,47912,113896,95982,105176],"class_list":["post-1762894","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-contingut-original-ca","category-humanisme-i-espiritualitat-ca","category-salut-ca","tag-el-fracas","tag-nou-humanisme","tag-psicologia-nuevo-humanismo-ca","tag-rehuno-salut","tag-serie-ca"],"yoast_head":"\nGr\u00e0cies frac\u00e0s, si no hagu\u00e9s estat per tu...<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Creieu que fracasar en alguna cosa \u00e9s... un frac\u00e0s? Un error? Un desastre? Alguna cosa que cal evitar? Tot el contrari! 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