Have You Noticed?

Have you noticed that everybody is right? Maybe you think I’m joking? Maybe you think I’m playing some kind’ve gotcha game with you by saying that everybody is right and you’re already on your toes reading this? You’re in position! You’re in unhoodwinkable mode. Well surprise, surprise! I’m not writing this to hoodwink you.

Although after I show you how I’m not trying to trick you you still might feel like I tricked you. If this ends up being the case however, you’ll only be bamboozling yourself. So if you’re gonna read on do so with caution. Or don’t read on with caution. Or don’t read on but remain cautious. Any which way, it’ll be up to you whether or not you agree with the fact that everybody is always right and that I am absolutely not trying to trick you in any way.

Ask Your Neighbors

Try knocking on the doors of all the neighbors on your block or in your apartment complex or wherever you reside. When a neighbor answers the door start asking them questions. Ask their opinions on any subject you like. Politics, music, art, science, neighborhood gossip, television shows, whatever you feel like querying them about. If you’re careful to ask the questions in a manner and a form that’s friendly and you’re able to assure them that you’re not trying to catch them out or make them look foolish in any way, you’ll find that they have an opinion, a take, a philosophy about absolutely everything. You’ll also find that they are always right. Yes really, always right. Even when one of them says something like “But I might be incorrect about that last bit …”, even then, you’ll see, they’re still just as right.

Are you catching my drift yet? Even on a subject like, say, the unknown, if you can make these people feel relaxed and unintimidated enough you’ll see that they have a whole array of ideas and opinions about it. Again, I’m not tricking you here. Actually try doing this in some form. The act of thinking about doing something and the act of actually doing something exist in two entirely different area codes. You have to actually try this to really know if you think it’s true or not. And remember, the level of success you achieve when you attempt this experiment is dependent on how comfortable and safe you are able to make your neighbors feel when you ask them your questions about all and everything.

The Exception

There is one exception to the rule that everybody is always right. That exception is me. Yes that’s correct, just me. I have been able, by some stroke of miraculousness that I have no way to explain to you here, been able to circumvent the seemingly uncircumventable conundrum of always being right. Ive tried retracing my steps over the years in an attempt to locate some kind of pattern, some sort of logical explanation for how I was able to do this, but alas, I have not been able to.

You see, somehow, via a perfectly fortunate combination of as yet unseen factors I have gained what I call an “objective subjectivity” that no one else has achieved, as far as I know. I realize that what you’re reading now probably sounds like the height of hubris and/or the depths of derangement. I assure you though, I have somehow broken through the always right matrix. I have achieved actual Wrongness. This ability, this gift/curse from the universe has rendered me the only suitable judge of everything there is to judge because I alone have transcended the species-wide mental tendency to always be right.
I could go on further about this but in all honestly I’d just be riffing in the dark. It is the way it is. This is simply the way things are for me.

By Grace and Grace Alone

To those of you who’ve made it this far, to those who have broken through their resistances and who are seeing this Truth — I tell you, I can feel you already beginning to aspire, to imagine and to intend. These are healthy impulses but it’s better that you drop them as soon as you possibly can. Mind you I’m not saying that you don’t have it in you to achieve Wrongness. I’m saying that Wrongness is accessed only via Grace and Grace alone. You cannot will it. You cannot petition the universe to bestow it upon you. Wrongness will either appear in you or it won’t. Quite frankly there’s nothing you can do about it either way.

And so in closing, I’ll just say c’est la vie! if you need an objectively subjective take on anything don’t be bashful, email me.